Everything is "completely normal." Yes, that's a direct quote. My appointment was oddly reassuring. I am 1.5 cm dilated, and "nice and soft" up there. The baby is fully engaged now, which I was very pleased to hear. My next appointment is on my due date, June 6. Hopefully I won't be able to make it!
I am trying to stay chill & patient. It gets a little tough when Dh calls in the middle of the day to ask if I'm having contractions. Ha ha Apparently some of his female coworkers have been sharing their tips of what worked for them:
- do squats until your water breaks (no thanks)
- orgasm (yes, please)
The baby partied for an hour last night and I just enjoyed it. I don't know how much longer I'll get to feel her kicks and squirms in quite this way.
Wednesday, May 31, 2006
Tuesday, May 30, 2006
Feeling Better Today
I am not as frustrated/impatient today. I realized yesterday evening that I will have the baby within 3 weeks, no matter what. That cheered me up quite a bit. I just need to stop dwelling on it, as that will only make me antsier.
[Though I found out today Ann my pregnancy twin (due 6/8) had her baby yesterday. Wah!]
Brian and Renee had us over for dinner last night. Then Brian and Dh had a nerf gun war which was surprisingly entertaining. Brian channeled his inner Jack Bauer and it was hilarious. And due to their workouts (Dh & Brian lift together 1-3 times a week), Dh's shirt was tight on his biceps. Yum!
[Though I found out today Ann my pregnancy twin (due 6/8) had her baby yesterday. Wah!]
Brian and Renee had us over for dinner last night. Then Brian and Dh had a nerf gun war which was surprisingly entertaining. Brian channeled his inner Jack Bauer and it was hilarious. And due to their workouts (Dh & Brian lift together 1-3 times a week), Dh's shirt was tight on his biceps. Yum!
Monday, May 29, 2006
I Don't Know How to Turn Off the Flash
38 weeks, 6 days pregnant
And so you can get the full impact of the enormous belly...
And so you can get the full impact of the enormous belly...
Curse It
By 11:30 last night, contractions were coming every 4 minutes, and about half were painful. And now? Every 15-20 minutes. Blast.
Sunday, May 28, 2006
Grrr
Feeling very grouchy after a phone conversation with my mother.
I previously had to tell her bluntly, "You can come for 7-10 days after the baby is born." She was expecting to come out for a full two weeks. I figured if my mom comes out for 10 days, then M-i-l for 10 days, that still gives Dh and I 2 weeks to get used to being a family before he goes back to work.
Once I said the 7-10 days, her next tactic was to suggest coming out early "to help me and get to know the area" because according to her I am suddenly going to become immobile once I am 39 weeks. I was very tempted to ask if the 10 days started ticking once she arrived, even if it meant her 10 days were up 2 days after the baby was born, but I do still have self control! I bit my tongue and told her we intend to stick to the original plan of calling her when I go into labor and she will get here as soon as she can. She was obviously dissatisfied with my response and asked me to talk it over with Dh.
Which I did. I broached the subject with, "I have already made up my mind, but I told my mother I would discuss it with you, so here it is." He had the same smart aleck response I did. Ha ha
Today my mom asked if I had talked her idea over with Dh. I told her I had and that we are sticking with our original plan. She was very manipulative throughout the entire phone conversation and was trying to make me feel guilty for letting her stay "only" 10 days. She said, "I am willing to come for 2 weeks, but since you're only letting me stay 7-10 days [I know perfectly well she will not stay only 7 days, so I'm sure she just said that to let me know it bugged her], I am more than willing to come out early," and, "If you change your mind at any time, even if it's the day before your due date, I will come out." She brought it up at least four times in a 30-minute phone call.
[She also asked me about those &#$*$% pills again, and I said, "I am taking my prenatals." She was silent, and then I changed the subject. *#$&$(%]
It was all I could do not to snap at her. I am the one having the baby, so shouldn't I get the say? Why will she not respect my decisions? I understand she is excited out of her head about having a grandchild, but I am so sick of her blatant attempts at manipulation. I am starting to feel so much resentment at the way she is acting, I am worried I will blow up at her about something when she is here. Like if she starts back in on having the baby in our room, or what position the baby should sleep in.
I love my mother, but there is a reason I live across the country from her. I am already worried how we are all going to get along for 10 days. I have tried very hard to be polite but firm about the decisions Dh and I have made about having the baby, and I have really been quite successful. (I swear!) I feel, though, that I am the only one trying to be mature and respectful, and that my mom will say just about anything to make me see things her way.
*Sigh*
Mostly painless contractions about every 8-10 minutes.
[If you made it to the end of this post, you get a gold star for niceness! Sorry for the long complaint!!!!]
I previously had to tell her bluntly, "You can come for 7-10 days after the baby is born." She was expecting to come out for a full two weeks. I figured if my mom comes out for 10 days, then M-i-l for 10 days, that still gives Dh and I 2 weeks to get used to being a family before he goes back to work.
Once I said the 7-10 days, her next tactic was to suggest coming out early "to help me and get to know the area" because according to her I am suddenly going to become immobile once I am 39 weeks. I was very tempted to ask if the 10 days started ticking once she arrived, even if it meant her 10 days were up 2 days after the baby was born, but I do still have self control! I bit my tongue and told her we intend to stick to the original plan of calling her when I go into labor and she will get here as soon as she can. She was obviously dissatisfied with my response and asked me to talk it over with Dh.
Which I did. I broached the subject with, "I have already made up my mind, but I told my mother I would discuss it with you, so here it is." He had the same smart aleck response I did. Ha ha
Today my mom asked if I had talked her idea over with Dh. I told her I had and that we are sticking with our original plan. She was very manipulative throughout the entire phone conversation and was trying to make me feel guilty for letting her stay "only" 10 days. She said, "I am willing to come for 2 weeks, but since you're only letting me stay 7-10 days [I know perfectly well she will not stay only 7 days, so I'm sure she just said that to let me know it bugged her], I am more than willing to come out early," and, "If you change your mind at any time, even if it's the day before your due date, I will come out." She brought it up at least four times in a 30-minute phone call.
[She also asked me about those &#$*$% pills again, and I said, "I am taking my prenatals." She was silent, and then I changed the subject. *#$&$(%]
It was all I could do not to snap at her. I am the one having the baby, so shouldn't I get the say? Why will she not respect my decisions? I understand she is excited out of her head about having a grandchild, but I am so sick of her blatant attempts at manipulation. I am starting to feel so much resentment at the way she is acting, I am worried I will blow up at her about something when she is here. Like if she starts back in on having the baby in our room, or what position the baby should sleep in.
I love my mother, but there is a reason I live across the country from her. I am already worried how we are all going to get along for 10 days. I have tried very hard to be polite but firm about the decisions Dh and I have made about having the baby, and I have really been quite successful. (I swear!) I feel, though, that I am the only one trying to be mature and respectful, and that my mom will say just about anything to make me see things her way.
*Sigh*
Mostly painless contractions about every 8-10 minutes.
[If you made it to the end of this post, you get a gold star for niceness! Sorry for the long complaint!!!!]
38 Weeks, 5 days
I couldn't think of a title for this post, so I went with the obvious.
Still have the backache, still having Braxton Hicks contractions (more of which are starting to hurt), still slowly losing the plug, but other than that, I got nothin.
X-Men III was fun, cool action, kinda low on plot. I was hoping for a Wolverine-Rogue hookup, but oh well.
During the movie yesterday, I got really hot and my hands started to swell. It kind of freaked me out, because curling my hand into a fist was a little difficult. Today my hands are just a little swollen and making a fist feels fine. I've only had minimal swelling, and just in my feet previous to yesterday, so I'm pretty grateful that I didn't have any swelling anywhere else until almost 39 weeks!
We went to Costco to get the portable air conditioner. It should make things a lot more bearable this summer. If it ever gets warm again. I actually turned the heat on today because it was only 63 degrees in our house. Brrr! The pregnancy heat has kicked in though, and Dh is lovin' it! Last night around the house I was in short sleeves and he was wearing a jacket. Complete role reversal.
Still have the backache, still having Braxton Hicks contractions (more of which are starting to hurt), still slowly losing the plug, but other than that, I got nothin.
X-Men III was fun, cool action, kinda low on plot. I was hoping for a Wolverine-Rogue hookup, but oh well.
During the movie yesterday, I got really hot and my hands started to swell. It kind of freaked me out, because curling my hand into a fist was a little difficult. Today my hands are just a little swollen and making a fist feels fine. I've only had minimal swelling, and just in my feet previous to yesterday, so I'm pretty grateful that I didn't have any swelling anywhere else until almost 39 weeks!
We went to Costco to get the portable air conditioner. It should make things a lot more bearable this summer. If it ever gets warm again. I actually turned the heat on today because it was only 63 degrees in our house. Brrr! The pregnancy heat has kicked in though, and Dh is lovin' it! Last night around the house I was in short sleeves and he was wearing a jacket. Complete role reversal.
Friday, May 26, 2006
It's Back
Did I say my back wasn't hurting as badly? Yeah, scratch that. It's just as bad tonight.
Emotionally, I'm feeling really...delicate would be the word, I suppose. Like if I think about anything too hard I'll burst into tears.
Emotionally, I'm feeling really...delicate would be the word, I suppose. Like if I think about anything too hard I'll burst into tears.
Well If This is Labor...
...Then it's the slowest, most dink-around labor of all time. You were supposed to tell me all pregnant women have back pain, and you're sure it's nothing, and there are still days and days until my due date. Instead, you just get my hopes up even more! Ha ha
Still having back pain, but it's not as bad as last night. I took a HOT shower last night which sort of not really helped. As I went to bed, the baby was poking me so hard, I felt like she was trying to break my water herself! Dh slept for 12 hours (!) and in the morning he gave me a nice hard backrub.
I didn't really believe I was in labor for two reasons:
1) We are seeing X-Men III on Saturday.
2) The bathrooms have not been cleaned.
Perhaps these reasons do not make sense to you, but believe me, they make perfect sense to me.
However, I cleaned one of the bathrooms this morning, and I'm about to clean the other...
Still having back pain, but it's not as bad as last night. I took a HOT shower last night which sort of not really helped. As I went to bed, the baby was poking me so hard, I felt like she was trying to break my water herself! Dh slept for 12 hours (!) and in the morning he gave me a nice hard backrub.
I didn't really believe I was in labor for two reasons:
1) We are seeing X-Men III on Saturday.
2) The bathrooms have not been cleaned.
Perhaps these reasons do not make sense to you, but believe me, they make perfect sense to me.
However, I cleaned one of the bathrooms this morning, and I'm about to clean the other...
Thursday, May 25, 2006
Go Home a Winner
My back hurts so badly. Really, really, badly. Tell me not to get my hopes up. Please.
I feel like I'm about to start my period. Normally (that is, during PMS), I bust out the Icy Hot and make Dh give me a really hard backrub, and then I curl up on the sofa and Dh feels very sorry for me and tell me he can't understand why I like being a girl (pfah! men!). But as I'm not able to curl up right now, and Dh is actually asleep on the sofa, I have nothing to do about this pain. Owww....
Okay enough whining. I won something at Bunko tonight! Woo-hoo! Granted, just a door prize, but still! Something! After months and months of paying my $5 every month and coming home empty-handed, I won some flowers, which hopefully Dh will plant tomorrow. Red petunias. Don't tell me if they're cheap, I don't want to hear it! They're cute.
I think I might go wake Dh up and make him give me a backrub. Because seriously, what the crap. My back.
I feel like I'm about to start my period. Normally (that is, during PMS), I bust out the Icy Hot and make Dh give me a really hard backrub, and then I curl up on the sofa and Dh feels very sorry for me and tell me he can't understand why I like being a girl (pfah! men!). But as I'm not able to curl up right now, and Dh is actually asleep on the sofa, I have nothing to do about this pain. Owww....
Okay enough whining. I won something at Bunko tonight! Woo-hoo! Granted, just a door prize, but still! Something! After months and months of paying my $5 every month and coming home empty-handed, I won some flowers, which hopefully Dh will plant tomorrow. Red petunias. Don't tell me if they're cheap, I don't want to hear it! They're cute.
I think I might go wake Dh up and make him give me a backrub. Because seriously, what the crap. My back.
Tuesday, May 23, 2006
Ode to a Clean Kitchen
Wow, did I sleep poorly last night. My hips were killing like a mofo every time I moved. Apparently I move alot while sleeping.
If Brangelina have their baby before me, I'm going to be very annoyed.
Still having Braxton-Hicks, but less frequently. Bleh.
My kitchen is actually clean. *Smiles beatifically.* It hasn't been this clean since like, oh I don't know, I was SIX WEEKS PREGNANT. Ha ha The linen closet is restocked. Baby's clothes are organized by size and are basically all washed. I've even made good progress on the thank you notes! I am liking the staying-home thing. And Dh is liking the dinner ready (or nearly ready) when he gets home from work. Ha ha I still have plenty to do (yeah, that whole hospital bag thing?...); it's just so nice to have a clean home again. And it's so nice to take naps.
Dh is grouchy for unknown reasons, but is putting the changing table together, so I'm not digging too deep. Ha ha
I got everything we still needed for the baby (that I could think of) at Target today, which was really just: a Diaper Genie, baby monitor, and crib sheets. And...the baby really REALLY needed Raspberry Sorbet. Ooh, it was delicious.
If Brangelina have their baby before me, I'm going to be very annoyed.
Still having Braxton-Hicks, but less frequently. Bleh.
My kitchen is actually clean. *Smiles beatifically.* It hasn't been this clean since like, oh I don't know, I was SIX WEEKS PREGNANT. Ha ha The linen closet is restocked. Baby's clothes are organized by size and are basically all washed. I've even made good progress on the thank you notes! I am liking the staying-home thing. And Dh is liking the dinner ready (or nearly ready) when he gets home from work. Ha ha I still have plenty to do (yeah, that whole hospital bag thing?...); it's just so nice to have a clean home again. And it's so nice to take naps.
Dh is grouchy for unknown reasons, but is putting the changing table together, so I'm not digging too deep. Ha ha
I got everything we still needed for the baby (that I could think of) at Target today, which was really just: a Diaper Genie, baby monitor, and crib sheets. And...the baby really REALLY needed Raspberry Sorbet. Ooh, it was delicious.
Monday, May 22, 2006
And I Know...
I am way overdue with the belly shot...I KNOW!!! I promise I'll post one soon. Promise.
38 Weeks
Yesterday we took the hospital tour. Better late than never, eh? It was useful, I guess. This all still seems completely surreal. At this point, I can easier believe being pregnant forever than having a BABY. That I PUSH OUT. I mean, does that make any sense to you? No. The tour lady told Dh & I that we'd be back before we know it.
Baby Girl keeps dropping more and more. I am to the point where my belly just rests on my thighs when I sit down. LOTS of space between my boobs and my belly now. She was doing jumping jacks or something last night. Less movement, my butt. Today she is pretty chill, probably tired from her aerobic exercise last night.
My sleep pattern is beginning to resemble GFF's baby's. Ha ha I slept from midnight to 6 am, organized the baby's room some more, ate breakfast, then slept from 8:30 to 11. Today I've done laundry and dishes. I made cookies for tonight (we are hanging out with the Trents).
I spent an hour chatting with my mom. I got only mildly frustrated when she gave me a LOT of unsolicited advice. "You shouldn't have the baby in your room." "You should be taking those pills I sent you." "You might be fine this week, but next week you are not going to want to move, so I should come out early." Sigh. No, no, and NO. But thank you. We are going to have the baby in our room for a few weeks at least. And I am not taking those pills because I think they're a bunch of hooey. And you are not flying out early.
I did convince her to get a rental car when she comes (she wanted me to ask Rainbow to pick her up from the airport....). And I convinced her that M-i-l is not so insanely anxious to see the baby that she would be willing to share an air mattress with my mother. I told her to leave her Bollywood films at home. Oh, I just have to laugh. My mom is...eccentric.
Sister B is moving in a month to a town 45 minutes south. To a nice big house, 2,000 square feet, with 4 bedrooms and 2.5 bathrooms. Dang, I wish I had a rich uncle in NYC whose estate was so large that even after splitting it up among the other cousins I had enough for a down payment on a house! I have all the wrong relatives. Ha ha I'm KIDDING. I LOVE my relatives. I have an uncle who grows shrooms! You can't beat that!
Baby Girl keeps dropping more and more. I am to the point where my belly just rests on my thighs when I sit down. LOTS of space between my boobs and my belly now. She was doing jumping jacks or something last night. Less movement, my butt. Today she is pretty chill, probably tired from her aerobic exercise last night.
My sleep pattern is beginning to resemble GFF's baby's. Ha ha I slept from midnight to 6 am, organized the baby's room some more, ate breakfast, then slept from 8:30 to 11. Today I've done laundry and dishes. I made cookies for tonight (we are hanging out with the Trents).
I spent an hour chatting with my mom. I got only mildly frustrated when she gave me a LOT of unsolicited advice. "You shouldn't have the baby in your room." "You should be taking those pills I sent you." "You might be fine this week, but next week you are not going to want to move, so I should come out early." Sigh. No, no, and NO. But thank you. We are going to have the baby in our room for a few weeks at least. And I am not taking those pills because I think they're a bunch of hooey. And you are not flying out early.
I did convince her to get a rental car when she comes (she wanted me to ask Rainbow to pick her up from the airport....). And I convinced her that M-i-l is not so insanely anxious to see the baby that she would be willing to share an air mattress with my mother. I told her to leave her Bollywood films at home. Oh, I just have to laugh. My mom is...eccentric.
Sister B is moving in a month to a town 45 minutes south. To a nice big house, 2,000 square feet, with 4 bedrooms and 2.5 bathrooms. Dang, I wish I had a rich uncle in NYC whose estate was so large that even after splitting it up among the other cousins I had enough for a down payment on a house! I have all the wrong relatives. Ha ha I'm KIDDING. I LOVE my relatives. I have an uncle who grows shrooms! You can't beat that!
Saturday, May 20, 2006
Sadly, I've Been Awake for an Hour
This not sleeping thing? Sucks. Big. How can I be awake at 6:45 am on SATURDAY???? Waaaah.
Ann had her first baby a month early because she got a violent 24-hour flu the night before. So basically I need to catch the norovirus.
Ann had her first baby a month early because she got a violent 24-hour flu the night before. So basically I need to catch the norovirus.
Friday, May 19, 2006
Lo, How the Mighty are Fallen
The phone rang about 11:45 am. I ran to try to answer it. Since I'm carrying around, oh, THIRTY-EIGHT extra pounds right now, my balance is not what it used to be. Especially since like thirty-five of it is right out in front of me, announcing my delicate condition to the world in no uncertain terms (thus the stretch marks, see previous post).
So I lost my balance and fell forward onto an accent table in the living room. Which of course had a vase of flowers on it (my Mother's Day flowers - Dh is fabulous!). Through some pretty impressive and mostly subconscious contortions, my belly remained uninvolved. My knee took the brunt of it. I have a sizeable goose egg on it right now. And it kills like a mother.
Pollen from the lilies got everywhere and most of the water from the vase dumped out onto the floor. I even managed to scratch the table a little bit. At first I tried to clean up, but then I felt my knee through my jeans and freaked out (the goose egg was HUGE at first). Plopped a bag of frozen meatballs on my knee and sat down to cry for a while. [All this crying in the past two days - I tell ya, I'm an emotional wreck recently.]
Of course, Dh got home from his training just then, so instead of a smiling happy wife ready to greet him, he got a crying wife with a splotchy face and frozen meatballs on her knee. Oh well. He was of course very helpful, both with cleaning up, which he handled effortlessly [all that bending over would have taken me an hour], and with a nice lecture about how no phone call is that important, and I need to be more careful, and blah blah blah, and I had to listen and sheepishly admit he was 100% correct.
Then we got reacquainted. Yay! I sure missed him.
So I have spent today limping around and wincing while I flex my knee. The swelling has gone way down. I should have taken a picture, it really was huge.
Oh, and the best thing about Dh's training? He got to keep his Care Bear! YAY!!!! I forgot to mention that he named it Tonto. I think to counteract the turquoise-ness of it. So once we get Tonto washed, he is totally going in the baby's room. So he can tell Baby Girl, "You're special to me!"
So I lost my balance and fell forward onto an accent table in the living room. Which of course had a vase of flowers on it (my Mother's Day flowers - Dh is fabulous!). Through some pretty impressive and mostly subconscious contortions, my belly remained uninvolved. My knee took the brunt of it. I have a sizeable goose egg on it right now. And it kills like a mother.
Pollen from the lilies got everywhere and most of the water from the vase dumped out onto the floor. I even managed to scratch the table a little bit. At first I tried to clean up, but then I felt my knee through my jeans and freaked out (the goose egg was HUGE at first). Plopped a bag of frozen meatballs on my knee and sat down to cry for a while. [All this crying in the past two days - I tell ya, I'm an emotional wreck recently.]
Of course, Dh got home from his training just then, so instead of a smiling happy wife ready to greet him, he got a crying wife with a splotchy face and frozen meatballs on her knee. Oh well. He was of course very helpful, both with cleaning up, which he handled effortlessly [all that bending over would have taken me an hour], and with a nice lecture about how no phone call is that important, and I need to be more careful, and blah blah blah, and I had to listen and sheepishly admit he was 100% correct.
Then we got reacquainted. Yay! I sure missed him.
So I have spent today limping around and wincing while I flex my knee. The swelling has gone way down. I should have taken a picture, it really was huge.
Oh, and the best thing about Dh's training? He got to keep his Care Bear! YAY!!!! I forgot to mention that he named it Tonto. I think to counteract the turquoise-ness of it. So once we get Tonto washed, he is totally going in the baby's room. So he can tell Baby Girl, "You're special to me!"
Last Day
Yesterday was my last day of work. I actually worked, for which I feel I deserve a medal. Of course, I didn't work much. Since I had a doctor's appointment at 10. (I am 1 cm dilated! Boy howdy!) And then at 12:30 was the "surprise" baby shower, which was completely not a surprise because Marissa thought I knew about it and asked me on Tuesday what kind of cake I wanted. So anyway. I got more cute stuff. And seriously, this kid. Like she needs all this clothing. My gosh.
As I walked to my car at 5:30, I started crying. Which surprised me. I am sad to leave my job. I worked there for 2 years and 8 months, which for me is a very very long time. I mean, I'm only 25, people. But as I sat in my car wishing I had the cell so I could call JDub to discuss, I realized I was only partly crying about leaving my job. I was mostly crying because I am scared to all crap about starting my NEW job.
I have worked at several offices. Your first day is always scary - meeting everyone and trying frantically (and unsuccessfully) to remember names, making sure you seem friendly and not weird, appearing confident and teachable, etc. I worked as a temp for a while, and so got pretty good at the "first day" routine. But this new job? This staying at home gig I'm starting sometime in the next month? I have ZERO experience. I do not count babysitting. I do not count being the oldest of 6 kids. It's completely different from anything I have ever done.
Having no one else to talk to, I said a prayer (how lame that it only occurs to me to pray because I have no cell phone with me). At the end, a thought popped in my head that calmed me immensely. I remembered something Dan told Dh and me last week. I am completely condensing a really complex discussion into one sentence, but here it is: as long as you as a parent are doing your very best to keep your covenants and live as you believe, and raise your child accordingly, your kid(s) will be okay. And once I remembered that, I felt okay again. Because I cannot guarantee that I will handle my child correctly every time. Sometimes I am going to lose my temper, or accidentally teach my child that "jackhole" is what you call bad drivers. I'm pretty sure those things are going to happen. But I can promise to do my best, dang it! THAT I can do!
(But don't ask me about the meltdown I had later that night about stretch marks, because then you will know just how shallow and selfish I really am. I am NOT telling you about it. Needless to say, by the time I went to bed, I was emotionally and physically exhausted.)
As I walked to my car at 5:30, I started crying. Which surprised me. I am sad to leave my job. I worked there for 2 years and 8 months, which for me is a very very long time. I mean, I'm only 25, people. But as I sat in my car wishing I had the cell so I could call JDub to discuss, I realized I was only partly crying about leaving my job. I was mostly crying because I am scared to all crap about starting my NEW job.
I have worked at several offices. Your first day is always scary - meeting everyone and trying frantically (and unsuccessfully) to remember names, making sure you seem friendly and not weird, appearing confident and teachable, etc. I worked as a temp for a while, and so got pretty good at the "first day" routine. But this new job? This staying at home gig I'm starting sometime in the next month? I have ZERO experience. I do not count babysitting. I do not count being the oldest of 6 kids. It's completely different from anything I have ever done.
Having no one else to talk to, I said a prayer (how lame that it only occurs to me to pray because I have no cell phone with me). At the end, a thought popped in my head that calmed me immensely. I remembered something Dan told Dh and me last week. I am completely condensing a really complex discussion into one sentence, but here it is: as long as you as a parent are doing your very best to keep your covenants and live as you believe, and raise your child accordingly, your kid(s) will be okay. And once I remembered that, I felt okay again. Because I cannot guarantee that I will handle my child correctly every time. Sometimes I am going to lose my temper, or accidentally teach my child that "jackhole" is what you call bad drivers. I'm pretty sure those things are going to happen. But I can promise to do my best, dang it! THAT I can do!
(But don't ask me about the meltdown I had later that night about stretch marks, because then you will know just how shallow and selfish I really am. I am NOT telling you about it. Needless to say, by the time I went to bed, I was emotionally and physically exhausted.)
Tuesday, May 16, 2006
37 Weeks
Okay so here's my new theory - the baby will be born on June 11. And I'll tell you why. June 11 is the next full moon. The last full moon was May 13. I had Braxton-Hicks contractions that night like you wouldn't believe. 10 an hour, no joke. But obviously Baby was not ready to come (nor was I ready for her to come!!!!). So, my guess is that she'll be a full moon baby. My boss predicts June 1. Nah, too early. Rainbow predicts June 12, because I already took June 11. Ha ha Anyone else care to place a bet?
Dh is away at training this week. Apparently as one of the new guys he has to carry around a Care Bear and not let the others guys steal it. It's turquoise. With a rainbow on the belly. That says phrases like "You're special to me!" I was laughing my butt off! He doesn't seem to find it that funny. Some people have no sense of humor.
I am missing him though. I watch TV when he's gone. Which I NEVER do. But when he's gone, I get really bored. My husband is quite entertaining. So I watched the season finale of Grey's Anatomy. Never having watched the show before at all. I got pretty into it, though. And being pregnant, even teared up during some parts.
Brian and Renee want us to go to Hawaii with them next year on a kid-free vacation. Hopefully we can budget that in, because it sounds really fun. Plus if we go with them Dh won't constantly heckle me to go snorkeling with him. Snorkeling makes me seasick.
Only 2 1/2 more days of work!!
Dh is away at training this week. Apparently as one of the new guys he has to carry around a Care Bear and not let the others guys steal it. It's turquoise. With a rainbow on the belly. That says phrases like "You're special to me!" I was laughing my butt off! He doesn't seem to find it that funny. Some people have no sense of humor.
I am missing him though. I watch TV when he's gone. Which I NEVER do. But when he's gone, I get really bored. My husband is quite entertaining. So I watched the season finale of Grey's Anatomy. Never having watched the show before at all. I got pretty into it, though. And being pregnant, even teared up during some parts.
Brian and Renee want us to go to Hawaii with them next year on a kid-free vacation. Hopefully we can budget that in, because it sounds really fun. Plus if we go with them Dh won't constantly heckle me to go snorkeling with him. Snorkeling makes me seasick.
Only 2 1/2 more days of work!!
Thursday, May 11, 2006
J & C's Sealing
J & C and C's daughters were sealed a few weeks ago. And I'm just now posting a pic. Be grateful! Ha ha
Left to right: F-i-l, Molly, J, C, Emma, & M-i-l. Aren't they cute?!
Left to right: F-i-l, Molly, J, C, Emma, & M-i-l. Aren't they cute?!
Tuesday, May 09, 2006
36 Weeks
This baby feels like she is going to drop out. Not down the way she is supposed to, but out the bottom of my belly. Like a garbage chute opening or something. Gah, I can't explain it, but it makes me want to walk around holding up my belly.
Oh and I forgot to mention - I found my first stretch mark Friday. *frown* It's very small, and right where the edge of my belly button used to be, so I have a sneaking suspicion it won't even be visible once I have the baby. Dh was very sweet and told me that he would still think I am hot, and that it is more important to make a baby than to have no stretch marks. I wanted to ask him if he really believed all that or was just trying to make me feel better, but I realized (thankfully BEFORE I opened my mouth) that I didn't really want to know! And I try to only ask questions to which I actually want to know the answers.
Marissa keeps getting my hopes up that I will have the baby early. And I try not to think about it but quite frankly it's just not working.
Signs my body is preparing for labor:
1) Frequent Braxton-Hicks. Starting Friday night, there are times I have 5-6 contractions 7-8 minutes apart. But then they always space back out.
2) Occasional painful B-Hs.
3) Backache. This appeared Thursday and it feels identical to the way my back hurts when I am about to start my period.
4) Nesting. See previous post.
Not a sign my body is preparing for labor, but Baby is getting cramped in there. And jabs me hard to let me know she is displeased with the lack of space. Well, kid, you are welcome to come out if you find the accomodations unsatisfactory!! In fact, Sunday evening she was being quite ornery, kneeing me out the side of my belly in a most uncomfortable way.
Dh & I watched MI: III last night. Quite enjoyable. Much better than the 2nd. Completely unbelievable, of course. But in Mission Impossible, all I ask is for lots of explosions (check), masks (check), double agents (check), and ridiculously amazing gadgets (check). So it passed with flying colors!
Oh and I forgot to mention - I found my first stretch mark Friday. *frown* It's very small, and right where the edge of my belly button used to be, so I have a sneaking suspicion it won't even be visible once I have the baby. Dh was very sweet and told me that he would still think I am hot, and that it is more important to make a baby than to have no stretch marks. I wanted to ask him if he really believed all that or was just trying to make me feel better, but I realized (thankfully BEFORE I opened my mouth) that I didn't really want to know! And I try to only ask questions to which I actually want to know the answers.
Marissa keeps getting my hopes up that I will have the baby early. And I try not to think about it but quite frankly it's just not working.
Signs my body is preparing for labor:
1) Frequent Braxton-Hicks. Starting Friday night, there are times I have 5-6 contractions 7-8 minutes apart. But then they always space back out.
2) Occasional painful B-Hs.
3) Backache. This appeared Thursday and it feels identical to the way my back hurts when I am about to start my period.
4) Nesting. See previous post.
Not a sign my body is preparing for labor, but Baby is getting cramped in there. And jabs me hard to let me know she is displeased with the lack of space. Well, kid, you are welcome to come out if you find the accomodations unsatisfactory!! In fact, Sunday evening she was being quite ornery, kneeing me out the side of my belly in a most uncomfortable way.
Dh & I watched MI: III last night. Quite enjoyable. Much better than the 2nd. Completely unbelievable, of course. But in Mission Impossible, all I ask is for lots of explosions (check), masks (check), double agents (check), and ridiculously amazing gadgets (check). So it passed with flying colors!
Monday, May 08, 2006
My Weekend
Friday I went to Rainbow's. We went through all her baby clothes and she gave me a ton of stuff. At my doctor's appointment, I learned I am no longer measuring big. I am right on track. They had no appointments for this week, and the only appointment for next week is Thursday, i.e., my last day of work.*
That evening, I read In Style** and cross stitched. I am making the baby's stocking and I would like to have it done before she arrives. I have about 30 days. We'll see if I make it. Maybe if I am feeling spunky tonight I will take a picture of my progress. Which is significant. The problem is, the backstitching lies before me, and that will take 4-ever.
Anyway, Saturday I finished Prep***. Then I cross stitched more. And then, sit down, Gentle Reader. I nested. That's right. I went eight long months with not a peep from the nesting urge that supposedly lurked within me. It no longer lurks! It appeared on Saturday. I went through all the clothes Rainbow gave me, packed up everything 6 months & bigger, and then I washed half the remaining clothes and blankets. 2 loads, people. I have so many baby clothes that are 0-6 months, that I have four loads worth. This kid has almost as many clothes as me. Almost. Not really.
Saturday evening I watched "The Family Stone"**** with Brian & Renee. Afterwards, we chatted about houses, pregnancy (Renee is just entering her 2nd trimester) and purses. At one point, Brian was saying something about Louis Vuitton, interrupted himself, and said, "We need to talk about something else. I sound like a gay man." Ha ha Classic. Of course I had to tell Dh. And of course he teased Brian about it more than once on Sunday.
Sunday evening Brian & Renee had us & Dan & Danielle over for dinner. It was a lot of fun. Dan expounded on conspiracy theories - interesting, to say the least. Note to self - the Lehi excuse.
*I feel like a schmuck about this. "Hey it's my last day, and oh yeah, I won't be in until 11! Check ya!"
**Disappointing. Lucky is soo much better.
***Review: My feelings about this book are conflicted. The main character made me want to slap her. A lot. And repeatedly. She was so freaking self-absorbed and self-indulgent. And yet I finished the book. Why? Because I recognized a teensy bit of my own 16-year-old self within her. I remember being so apoplectically unsure of myself around guys that I acted like a complete retard. And I wanted to know what happened to her. But ultimately, I was disappointed in the book. She remained self-indulgent and self-absorbed. She still felt that melancholy and detachment were qualities to be admired and that surrendering one's self to pure happiness is a sign of naivete and something to be pitied. Which really bugs me. True happiness is my goal. I do not think cynicism is something to be proud of. Final grade: C. Not a D, because it is a well-written book.
****Review: Liked the movie without actually liking any of the characters. Well, except for Luke Wilson's character. He was great. The thing that bugged me about the movie, which JDub had already warned me about, was that the Stones were "accepting" without actually being accepting. They were accepting about things that are trendy to accept, like homosexuality, and "free love" or whatever you want to call it. They were completely not accepting of anyone who was different from themselves. Granted, SJP's character was tactless, which didn't actually jive with the rest of her character, but the Stone family decided very quickly that they hated her because...she was reserved? Traditional? I'm really not sure. Oh wait! Because she was different from them. Bleh. And why was it okay for her to be with the stoner son, but not the turtleneck son? And why was everyone chill with turtleneck son swapping SJP for Clarie Danes? Questions to which I may never know the answer. But I give it one thumb up, because it is that rare movie that ended exactly as I wanted.
That evening, I read In Style** and cross stitched. I am making the baby's stocking and I would like to have it done before she arrives. I have about 30 days. We'll see if I make it. Maybe if I am feeling spunky tonight I will take a picture of my progress. Which is significant. The problem is, the backstitching lies before me, and that will take 4-ever.
Anyway, Saturday I finished Prep***. Then I cross stitched more. And then, sit down, Gentle Reader. I nested. That's right. I went eight long months with not a peep from the nesting urge that supposedly lurked within me. It no longer lurks! It appeared on Saturday. I went through all the clothes Rainbow gave me, packed up everything 6 months & bigger, and then I washed half the remaining clothes and blankets. 2 loads, people. I have so many baby clothes that are 0-6 months, that I have four loads worth. This kid has almost as many clothes as me. Almost. Not really.
Saturday evening I watched "The Family Stone"**** with Brian & Renee. Afterwards, we chatted about houses, pregnancy (Renee is just entering her 2nd trimester) and purses. At one point, Brian was saying something about Louis Vuitton, interrupted himself, and said, "We need to talk about something else. I sound like a gay man." Ha ha Classic. Of course I had to tell Dh. And of course he teased Brian about it more than once on Sunday.
Sunday evening Brian & Renee had us & Dan & Danielle over for dinner. It was a lot of fun. Dan expounded on conspiracy theories - interesting, to say the least. Note to self - the Lehi excuse.
*I feel like a schmuck about this. "Hey it's my last day, and oh yeah, I won't be in until 11! Check ya!"
**Disappointing. Lucky is soo much better.
***Review: My feelings about this book are conflicted. The main character made me want to slap her. A lot. And repeatedly. She was so freaking self-absorbed and self-indulgent. And yet I finished the book. Why? Because I recognized a teensy bit of my own 16-year-old self within her. I remember being so apoplectically unsure of myself around guys that I acted like a complete retard. And I wanted to know what happened to her. But ultimately, I was disappointed in the book. She remained self-indulgent and self-absorbed. She still felt that melancholy and detachment were qualities to be admired and that surrendering one's self to pure happiness is a sign of naivete and something to be pitied. Which really bugs me. True happiness is my goal. I do not think cynicism is something to be proud of. Final grade: C. Not a D, because it is a well-written book.
****Review: Liked the movie without actually liking any of the characters. Well, except for Luke Wilson's character. He was great. The thing that bugged me about the movie, which JDub had already warned me about, was that the Stones were "accepting" without actually being accepting. They were accepting about things that are trendy to accept, like homosexuality, and "free love" or whatever you want to call it. They were completely not accepting of anyone who was different from themselves. Granted, SJP's character was tactless, which didn't actually jive with the rest of her character, but the Stone family decided very quickly that they hated her because...she was reserved? Traditional? I'm really not sure. Oh wait! Because she was different from them. Bleh. And why was it okay for her to be with the stoner son, but not the turtleneck son? And why was everyone chill with turtleneck son swapping SJP for Clarie Danes? Questions to which I may never know the answer. But I give it one thumb up, because it is that rare movie that ended exactly as I wanted.
Monday, May 01, 2006
Five Things
Long overdue, for Katie.
Can I change it to four things? I really had trouble coming up with five things for each category. Except for the free time one. Which says something about me, I’m sure.
Five Movies You Can Watch Over and Over:
1. Sense & Sensibility
2. Stargate
3. The Man Who Knew Too Little
4. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
5.
Five embarrassing Songs that You Know All the Words To:
1. “Toxic” by Britney Spears
2. “Beautiful” by Christina Aguilera
3. “More Than a Feeling” by Boston
4. “Goodbye Earl” by The Dixie Chicks
5.
Five Memorable Halloween Costumes:
1. Doris Day
2. Scarlett O’Hara
3. Witch (when I was 16 I got a sister missionary to go with me, while her comp hung out with my family??? Now I look back and that’s really weird)
4. Gypsy
5.
Five Occupations that You Know You Could Never Do:
1. Kindergarten teacher - too many little grubby hands touching you without the whole mother-love thing to make it okay
2. Sales Associate at Ross Dress for Less
3. Actually any kind of sales
4. DMV desk clerk
5.
Five Books You've Recently Read Outside of Schoolwork:
1. Something Blue by Emily Giffin
2. Notes From the Underbelly - Risa Green
3. Tales From the Crib - Risa Green
4. Freakonomics - Steven Levitt (technically haven’t finished this one yet)
5. I haven’t been reading that much recently...
Five Ways to Perfectly Spend an Afternoon:
1. Sleeping
2. Reading
3. Watching CSI episodes with Dh
4. Finding Super Deals while shopping
5. Playing Bejeweled 2 until my hand cramps
Not Your 5 Favorite Foods, But the 5 You're Most Likely Eating:
1. Honey Bunches of Oats with Almonds
2. Blueberry bagel with whipped cream cheese
3. Cheez-its
4. Cheesy Hashbrowns Hamburger Helper
5. Carrots
Can I change it to four things? I really had trouble coming up with five things for each category. Except for the free time one. Which says something about me, I’m sure.
Five Movies You Can Watch Over and Over:
1. Sense & Sensibility
2. Stargate
3. The Man Who Knew Too Little
4. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
5.
Five embarrassing Songs that You Know All the Words To:
1. “Toxic” by Britney Spears
2. “Beautiful” by Christina Aguilera
3. “More Than a Feeling” by Boston
4. “Goodbye Earl” by The Dixie Chicks
5.
Five Memorable Halloween Costumes:
1. Doris Day
2. Scarlett O’Hara
3. Witch (when I was 16 I got a sister missionary to go with me, while her comp hung out with my family??? Now I look back and that’s really weird)
4. Gypsy
5.
Five Occupations that You Know You Could Never Do:
1. Kindergarten teacher - too many little grubby hands touching you without the whole mother-love thing to make it okay
2. Sales Associate at Ross Dress for Less
3. Actually any kind of sales
4. DMV desk clerk
5.
Five Books You've Recently Read Outside of Schoolwork:
1. Something Blue by Emily Giffin
2. Notes From the Underbelly - Risa Green
3. Tales From the Crib - Risa Green
4. Freakonomics - Steven Levitt (technically haven’t finished this one yet)
5. I haven’t been reading that much recently...
Five Ways to Perfectly Spend an Afternoon:
1. Sleeping
2. Reading
3. Watching CSI episodes with Dh
4. Finding Super Deals while shopping
5. Playing Bejeweled 2 until my hand cramps
Not Your 5 Favorite Foods, But the 5 You're Most Likely Eating:
1. Honey Bunches of Oats with Almonds
2. Blueberry bagel with whipped cream cheese
3. Cheez-its
4. Cheesy Hashbrowns Hamburger Helper
5. Carrots
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