Saturday, April 07, 2007

Real Moms...

So, ah, I just remembered today that Dooneybug tagged me for the Real Moms meme like 5 years ago and I never did it. Oops. Well, better late than never, eh?

Real moms gladly offer their cheeks for open-mouth kisses from their babies, even if said open mouths have half-chewed, soggy Cheerios within.

Which is a big deal for me, because I hate hate HATE to be dirty. According to my mother, even as a toddler I hated being dirty and would hold up my hands and whine until she cleaned me. I'm not completely prissy about it, I mean, I go camping, but I might be the cleanest camper ever. I don't think I could mud wrestle. I just couldn't do it.

Anyway, Dh is fishing with T of course, despite light rain off and on all day. I took Baby E to Michaels & Target between her naps and to Old Navy & Children's Place after her pm nap. She's a good sport. A lady at Target told me Baby E is the cutest baby she has ever seen, so I love that lady. And a (male) employee at Michaels used the "How old is she?" line and tried to chat me up. *Rolling my eyes* I don't like it when guys try to hit on me by using my baby!!!! Comment on my cute butt, or something, please, but not the baby. Ha ha I'm kidding. Well, not about the baby part, it does actually bug me.

Children's Place was having a nice sale, so I stocked up on shirts for Baby E in sizes 18 mos, 2T & 3T. And suddenly felt a strange stirring - I thought about having another baby, and didn't start to hyperventilate. In fact, it sound nice. I wanted it. There is this little fear in the back of my mind - the thought of having another miscarriage. It makes me want to cry. I don't know how well I'd do if that happened again. I'm trying to trust God, since I know He's watching out for me. I felt that so strongly when I miscarried in 2005, and I know that at least part of what He wanted me to learn from that is that I'm not in control! He is. I have a hard time remembering that.

Ugh, when is Dh coming home? He's making shish kebabs tonight, and I'm starving! Stupid fishing! Of course I can't just eat something in the meantime, that would be too logical!

3 comments:

Chas said...

I have the same fear that when/if I do get pregnant again that it'll be another miscarriage...grrr...I try not to focus on that.

Christy said...

For the longest time, the thought of having another baby was terrifying. Then, suddenly it didn't sound so immpossible. I have been having lots of the same feeling lately...

Emily May said...

I just always have that feeling, haha