Friday, May 27, 2005

I talked to Rainbow today, somehow we talked for 45 minutes about abso-frickin-lutely nothing. Usually our convos are quite amusing, plenty of quiet laughter (can't guffaw too loud on the phone at work), but today we were both so boring. I don't know, it was awkward or something. Maybe I'm a one bff girl. I've been hanging out with JW so much lately that it's like I only speak her language now. I haven't chilled with Rainbow in so long. Plus, my life has been pretty quiet recently. Which is bad, because I should not be bored. And I'm getting bored again. How the crap will I possibly be able to handle being a stay-at-home mom someday????? I secretly thrive off the drama. I need a steady, but not overwhelming stream of it.
This just reminded me of Nancy. Dh was telling me something about her, and I realized she is kind of like me re drama. Complains about it, professes to abhor it, but secretly thrives on it, talks about it constantly. That's Nancy, and that's me. I don't usually like to start drama, because that means someone's pissed at me, but I think it's rather exciting when other people start drama.
The evil part of me wants to flirt with Golden Eagle on purpose just to piss JW off and make her stop judging, judging, judging. Though obviously that course of action would be spectacularly ineffective at getting JW to stop judging the world (and me) by her standards. She was telling me this story a few weeks ago about some friend from her high school days, and she said that in HS she was the judgmental one. And then she said, "I know, you're like, what?!" when actually I was thinking, "Not much has changed, eh, J." Sometimes she is phenomenally insightful and wonderful and hilarious. And then sometimes she busts out one of her closeminded judgments and I just want to shake sense into her. Or at least a slightly broader worldview.
I watched the Mrs. World pageant tonight. Apparently you have to have big chachis to win. That would rule me out. But actually the girl who won was truly gorgeous and very charming. Sister B and I looked into entering the Mrs. Oregon pageant a while ago, but you have to front a bunch of dough and we are both poor. Ok that's a lie. I really shouldn't even claim to be poor. That's like David brainwashing his children to think they're poor. The real reason I won't be entering the Mrs. Oregon pageant is I cannot prioritize it over all the clothes I could buy with two grand. Ha ha We tossed around the idea of getting sponsors, but that sounded suspiciously like work. Plus, I was thinking about it tonight as I walked around my neighborhood - if I became Mrs. Oregon, I would be embarrassed and wouldn't want anyone to know. I feel like people wouldn't take me seriously. Better to let some chick who will cry and be thrilled spend her money there. I have a hard enough time being taken seriously as it is. David, whose opinion doesn't really count, tried to label me a trophy wife. What a retard. If I was a trophy wife, wouldn't I have snagged myself a doctor? Seriously.
Speaking of David, I've basically decided to only go over to their house when he is out of town. Which is part of the reason I haven't been over there in a while. I will just feel more comfortable this way, and I think Rainbow will too.

2 comments:

Katie said...

Remember when Jill and I signed you up for the Miss USA pagent? Maybe you never found out about that. It was really funny to us.

Yeah, being judgemental is for the birds. Remember how mean I used to be? Yuck! It makes me ill to think about.

Katie said...

When are you going to post again?!?!?!