Miss E dumped Cocoa Krispies all over her brother's head and the carpet this morning while I used the bathroom. Have you ever cleaned wet Cocoa Krispies off a carpet? It's a freaking joke. I had to pick them all up by hand. I swore in my wrath that tomorrow I am ordering a carpet cleaner. I tried to get Miss E to help me, but she kept accidentally stepping on them and grinding them into the carpet more. I had a minor meltdown.
I was a grouchy mess by the time Dh got home from his church meetings. Both kids were half-naked and I was still in my pajamas. And yet somehow we were ten minutes early for church. That's journal worthy. Ten minutes late is what we are 99% of the time, and I'm not exaggerating. At least I looked smokin', which did ease my angst temporarily.*
During the sacrament, Miss E said everything loudly. "That baby's cute! Can I take my shoes off? Is the sacrament over yet? Can I have some pretzels? Can I take my shoes off? Can I take my shoes off?" A red haze passed before my eyes as I whispered "Shhh!" ineffectually.
My husband made dinner and then expected accolades for it. Is the kitchen messy? Yes! How did you know? I know you're supposed to reward desired behavior with positive reinforcement, but I just didn't have it in me. I was too busy being grouchy, if you must know.
I oversaw the children playing in the pool. After Miss E threw water in Ace's face for the 9,000th time and threw all of his toys out for the 135th time, I picked her up and carried her naked soaking body into the house to spend some enforced quality time with her father. I could hear her screaming bloody murder even with the door closed. On the plus side, once she was gone, Ace played quite contentedly in the pool for ages.
I was not a nice mom or wife today. The good thing is I get to try again tomorrow.
*Apparently exercise really does make one look better. Who knew?